


Thoughts on Audience Reactions to LGBTQ Media and LGBTQ Readings in Media

by astronbookfilms (galaxyture)



Category: Multi-Fandom
Genre: Essays, F/F, M/M, Meta, Nonfiction
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-17
Updated: 2019-01-10
Packaged: 2019-09-21 10:40:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,878
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17042183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/galaxyture/pseuds/astronbookfilms
Summary: These essays analyze the ways fans, critics, media creators, and the general public relate to works that are either confirmed LGBTQ works or LGBTQ readings of works that are are not explicitly confirmed as being LGBTQ works in the story canon. The essays are either not specifically related to a specific fandom or relate to works that appear to have either no fandom or a tiny fandom. If the chapter includes spoilers for a work it will warn for them in the beginning notes of the chapter.





	1. Chapter Index and Notes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a list of chapters so you can easily view ones that interest you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Men and women refers to a person’s gender identity. Thus, a trans man is a man.

Chapter 1: This page; Chapter 2: Everyone Can See It, but Can They Admit It?; Chapter 3: Why LGBTQ Representation is Important in a World Where People Who are LGBTQ Face Discrimination and Violence; Chapter 4: Double Standards for LGBTQ Couples; Chapter 5: Romantic Subtext in the Original UK version of "The Office" and how it relates to LGBTQ representation;


	2. Everyone Can See It, but Can They Admit It?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This essay focuses on the tendency of professional film reviewers to be aware at some level of the homoeroticism in a friendship between two male characters, but be hesitant to directly address it in their review.

Several months ago, I was watching a film that came out a several years ago and noticed there seemed to be a homoerotic element to the friendship between the two main male characters. I am not someone who looks for gay subtext and often I don’t see it in cases when other people do. With this film I could not stop seeing no matter how hard I tried to argue with myself that I didn’t think it was supposed to be in the film.

One of the men had a girlfriend. The other one hooked up with women. The man who hooked up with women clearly didn’t care about any of them. He was definitely in the category of have all emotional attachments to a male friend and women were only useful for sex and professional usefulness.   
The film had political elements and after I saw it I read reviews from publications with different biases as I was curious how they would view the film in light of the political content. I didn’t expect most or all of them to see the homoerotic tones to the friendship. To my surprise reviews across the board addressed the friendship in ways that showed they had clearly seen “something” between the two men. Some of the reviewers, especially from more conservative publications and sources, were over-the-top at insisting it was just a bromance as if they were trying to convince themselves as well as the reader.

Sadly, it is common for people to think that being gay/bi/pan/anything not straight is just about sex. It struck me again in watching the film and reading the reviews that in this film- like so many other stories- it was the straight relationships that were about sex.

The main “love story” was between the two men. Unlike many films in which the main "love story" is between two male friends, the girlfriend had a personality, the couple seemed to like each other, and the actors playing the couple had chemistry. However, the fact remained that the man would rather spend time with his friend than his girlfriend. Time and time again the audience is shown that his friend is a greater priority to him than his girlfriend.

This was originally posted on my now deleted-by-me Tumblr secondary blog abookastarandlife.


	3. Why LGBTQ Representation is Important in a World Where People Who are LGBTQ Face Discrimination and Violence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter argues that LGBTQ representation is still important in a world where people who are LGBTQ face threats of violence, are disowned from their families, imprisoned, are forbidden from getting married or adopting children, can be denied housing for being LGBTQ, can be fired for being LGBTQ, and face other forms of discrimination.

One more LGBTQ character or pairing will not save the world. It will not lead to marriage equality throughout the world. It will not stop people from being assaulted on the streets for existing while being LGBTQ. It will not stop people from being fired for being LGBTQ. It will not stop people from being denied housing because they are LGBTQ. It will not stop people from being disowned and shunned for being LGBTQ. It will not stop people from being bullied for being LGBTQ. 

It is still important. It can still make a difference. Maybe it only makes a difference for a few thousands people. Maybe only 2% of LGBTQ viewers' families realize that they are not evil and going to hell for being LGBTQ. Maybe only 8% of viewers feel less alone and less like an unwanted freak.

That small percent that is helped still matters. As bad as representation is now it is between than it was 10 years ago let alone 20 or 50 years ago. The more being LGBTQ is normalized in the media the more people who are LGBTQ feel that they are accepted and the more people who are not LGBTQ realize that that someone being LGBTQ does not make them lesser, evil, or more likely to abuse someone. It would be nice if everyone knew people who were openly LGBTQ. Unfortunately, that is not true now and won't be true as long as anti-LGBTQ attitudes and laws exist. For some people the only time they will see any hint of what LGBTQ people go through is through media. It isn't ideal, but we do not live in an ideal world.

Everyone wants the “big impact”, but in real life it is often the small impacts adding up that matter. 

For some fans Malec is enough. For others “Maurice” or “God’s Own Country” makes them feel valued. For others it is “Carol”, “Black Mirror: San Junipero”, or Janelle Monae’s “Dirty Computer”. Many others are still waiting to see an LGBTQ film, TV show, play, web series, music video, or other media that really reflect them, their identity, and how they feel. 

We need more representation. A black lesbian living in London will have a different life experience than a white gay man living in Mississippi in the US. They may both understand discrimination, but the way they experience it and the challenges they face will be different. Two white gay men living in San Francisco will not have identical experiences. One might have an accepting family, but has a serious health issue that affects them physically, emotionally, and mentally. Another is healthy and good-looking, but his family is convinced he is going to hell and wants him to undergo so-called "gay conversion therapy". 

No one story will appeal to everyone, but it can appeal to some people and really make a difference in their lives.


	4. Double Standards for LGBTQ couples

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter addresses the double-standards between straight cis and LGBTQ couples in media.

Double standards between straight and LGBTQ relationships in commercial media are common. Even when an LGBTQ couple is alone and fear of homophobic and/or transphobic reactions cannot be used as an excuse, they tend to be less likely to kiss, make out, and have sex than straight cis couples in similar situations. 

At the same time LGBTQ relationships are sometimes seen only in terms of kisses, making out, and having sex. Certainly there are LGBTQ relationships that are all about sex just as there are straight cis ones that are all about sex, but there are many more that also include emotional and non-sexual intimacy. It is treated as a given that a straight romantic relationship often includes friendship. Sometimes it means cuddling in front of the TV. Sometimes it means going to a sporting event or film you are not interest in, but your partner loves just as it means your partner sometimes going to one because they know you will love it. Sometimes it means being able to sense when your partner is unhappy and knowing how to make them feel better. 

There is a disturbing tendency to think that intimacy for LGBTQ couples only means kisses, making out, and sex. Real intimacy sometimes means a comforting shoulder rub, running your fingers through your partner’s hair, listening to them, assuring them things will be work out, doing the dishes when they are tired, telling a joke to cheer them up, and other non-sexual ways of showing affection. 

Sometimes kisses, making out, and sex really do not fit the situation. Sometimes simply giving your partner space or holding them is what they need. Also, one can easily kiss, make out, and have sex without love being involved. 

If someone is only interested in stories where a couple kiss, make-out, and have sex that is their choice. The part that worries me that some people do not see that true intimacy and a loving LGBTQ relationship there can be both sexual and emotional intimacy. 

By the same token although in some LGBTQ relationships one or both people are asexual for many LGBTQ couples sex and sexual activity is part of their relationship and only showing ess physical intimacy is dishonest and often cowardly. Not everyone is comfortable writing sex scenes. Not all actors and actresses are comfortable performing them. Nobody should feel forced to do it if it makes them uncomfortable. But if someone is comfortable writing or acting straight sex and sexual activity scenes, but not LGBTQ ones that has homophobic and/or transphobic implications. If someone is closeted and afraid they will reveal their true sexuality or gender identity by writing an LGBTQ sex scene I have some sympathy, but for straight cis people it is often a sign of homophobia or transphobia. If the issue is ignorance there are people with the knowledge and willingness to help those who approach them from a perspective of wanting to learn. The double-standard is the problem. 

I wonder if seeing LGBTQ relationships as only relating to things that are purely sexual is a conscious or subconscious way of putting up a giants wall between it and the close in many ways intimate friendships that frequently exit between "straight and cis" women or "straight and cis" men and reassuring ones' self that sexuality and gender or boxes rather than a spectrum.


	5. Romantic Subtext in The Original (UK) Version of The Office and LGBTQ Stories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter uses the example of the original UK version of The Office to showcase heterosexual subtext that is easily understood and unquestioned by the audience and questions why homosexual subtext that is at least as blatant is dismissed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This post contains spoilers for the original UK version of The Office.

"I will feel like a friend feels."

The quote above is one of Tim Canterbury’s lines from the Christmas Special of _The Office_. At the beginning of the Special we see Dawn and Lee (her fiance) in Florida and Dawn is holding a baby. Not exactly an optimistic scene for anyone with wants to see Tim (who is back in the Slough, England) and Dawn together. 

For virtually the entire show Dawn has a finance. Tim has a girlfriend during the second series. The audience can clearly see the chemistry between Tim and Dawn and yet anytime there seems to be hope of them getting together they are not willing to make the leap.

A lot of Tim’s time is spend playing pranks on and being annoyed at his deskmate Gareth. Gareth attitudes towards Dawn vary between complimentary (offering her the job back in the Special) and horrifying. They all have to deal with David Brent (Ricky Gervais), a boss who thinks he is well-meaning, but can be a frustrating, annoying, racist, and sexist boss.

It is only in the last few minutes of the Christmas Special that Dawn breaks up with Lee off-screen and that Tim and Dawn become a couple.

Yet I have never heard of anyone watching _The Office_ and not realizing that the heart of the show is the love story between Tim and Dawn. Despite the characters’ denials and their other relationships and plot lines, it is clear that they are romantically and physically attracted to each other.

So why do viewers who have no problem understanding Tim and Dawn have so much trouble when it is two men or two women? Obviously, some stories were written and/or filmed at times when having an LGBTQ was not realistically possible. If homosexuality (or any non-straight sexuality or non-cis gender identity) is illegal it is often impossible to include overtly LGBTQ couples or characters in widely available stories. Films made during the years of the Hayes Code also did not have the option. But why is it that fans who point out that a potential LGBTQ has a lot of standard romantic tropes are frequently declared crazy? My own preference is towards confirmed couples or confirmed romantic storylines, but I don't think fans are crazy for pointing out how many same-sex pairings' relationships include romantic tropes.


End file.
